Shortly after I was married my Father-in-law asked me about one of my relatives. He said "How did George (name changed) get to be so nice? He's so softspoken and thoughtful, it's really refreshing." My first impulse was to shrug my shoulders and mumble a non-committal "I dunno." You see, 'nice' isn't the word I would have picked to describe George. I would probably have picked 'angry' first.

George suffered from depression for years and years and years, and his depression mostly manifested itself in a short temper and violent outbursts. After a nervous breakdown George started treatment and it was like switching on a light, his behavior changed drastically overnight. Even though he no longer was grappling with depression, he still had to unlearn all sorts of emotional habits he had fallen into. Anger still came easily to him, because he was so familiar with it. George's early attempts at niceness seemed an affectation to me. I knew the real George, the real George was angry, and this guy was just putting on a charade.

However, the night that I spoke with my Father-in-law I realized that, I was wrong George really is nice. Possibly nice enough to be refreshingly softspoken and thoughtful. And how did he get to be that way? I knew the answer at once, George was so nice because he tried so hard. Sure the natural George was angry, and his first attempts at niceness were clumsy. But he kept at it, he wanted to be nice so much that he changed his own nature. After years of effort George is very nice and thoughtful. The temptation to fall into anger is still there, but he controls it because that is not who he wants to be. He is living proof that weak things can be made strong.

Talents that come naturally and effortlessly are certainly a blessing. But talents need not be naturally occuring to be authentic. In fact, I'd go so far as to say the most authentic talents are the ones that don't come naturally at all, because those are the talents that were constructed out of nothing but desire and effort.